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Tonks - Confused
Posted on Wednesday 19 November 2008 at 11:24 am

I has an advisor!! (I think.)

I just had either the best or worst possible meeting. As y'all know, I sent a frantic email to the professor that I want to be my advisor (technically, I haven't had a formal PhD advisor which has been annoying) about a week ago. In my mind, my email basically amounted to "I don't know what I'm doing! Help!!!" He said my email was very clear and concise and made it obvious that I know exactly what I'm doing and he thinks everything sounds great. He answered my three specific questions that I mentioned in the email and helped me figure out the handful of things I really need to do next. He also said he would certainly be on my committee, suggested a couple other people to be on my committee, and said he is perfectly willing to be my chair/advisor and sign off on anything as such or if I decide it makes more sense to have one of the others as chair he is perfectly willing to just be on the committee and offer advice in that capacity. We then talked about his advising philosophy for a bit so I'll be able to make an informed decision on if I want him to be my technical head advisor or not.

I can't decide if I should take him at his word and decide I know what I'm doing more than I thought I did and my expectations of myself and where I should be at this point in the process were just too high or if I somehow gave a wrong impression in my email and I am actually lost and confused and am now even more screwed because I'm lost and confused and have an advisor who doesn't realize that I'm lost and confused. For right now, I'm going to go with the former because it is so much more comforting than dwelling on the latter option.

Now if only this blasted cold or whatever that I have had for a couple of days now would go away so I could actually concentrate on the list of things we came up with for me to do.


What's Taters, Precious?
mrstater at 5:45 pm on 19 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
Trust the adviser! And yourself! Be an optimist!

Seriously, I'm so glad to hear you got a good, favorable response. And I hope it lowers your stress level and motivates you!
bratty_jedi at 6:29 pm on 19 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
My mom has been saying all along that she thinks I'm expecting too much from myself so she agrees with the advisor.

I do feel better. I think I'll be able to work out a more concrete work schedule in terms of tasks to accomplish which should help lower the stress quite a bit and let me feel more like I am making progress and more like I deserve time off. We shall see.
littlepixiechic at 11:11 pm on 19 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
I think you should definitely go with what your adviser says. I hope this helps lower your stress level!
bratty_jedi at 12:29 am on 20 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
I am definitely calmer this afternoon than I have been in a while. Of course, that could just be the cold meds talking ;)
Wild Magelet
wildmagelet at 1:56 am on 20 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
Even hearing about other people's PhD planning gives me a twitch at the moment. :) But on a less self-centred note, I'm glad things are progressing for you! And I would go with the former explanation; everything is so confusing and full of red tape at times that I blew lots of things out proportion and needed my supervisors to bring me back to earth. Nobody is expecting perfection - at least not yet! ;) I'm sure you're doing fine.
bratty_jedi at 2:15 am on 20 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)
Sorry for making you twitch.

I definitely keep having moments of "But this is my dissertation! I have to know everything and be able to answer every random question people might conceivably ask at job talks!" Unfortunately the little voice that keeps saying "Yes, you'll eventually need to be able to do that but not right now! You're just starting!" isn't loud enough. With the advisor providing that voice a little back up today, I'll hopefully destress at least a little.
labellerose at 7:04 pm on 20 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)

**Folds hands and chants**

""Truussst the advisor...Truust the advisssor"
Glad you are de-stressing a little.
bratty_jedi at 3:45 pm on 24 November 2008 (UTC) (Link)

Re: **Folds hands and chants**

I'm working on it. Honest! :)

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